The SEO Kama Sutra…Position is Everything with Keywords

The phrase Kama actually means ‘sexual pleasure’. In the Hindi philosophy, it is one of the four stepping stones to enlightenment and living a fulfilled life.

Those Hindis had something right.

The Kama Sutra is less about technique than it is positioning. See, in the right position, both parties can achieve fantastic, simultaneous orgasms that will leave them feeling like jelly. In the wrong position, their orgasm fizzles for a minute and then falls flat in the most disappointing way. Weirdly, the most successful positions aren’t usually the ones you would assume.

The same goes for SEO. The most successful positions for keywords are often positions that no one thinks about at all.

First, you need to start on the top. Just like the top is the spot where the first orgasm is achieved, the top is the spot that gets the most attention from Google. When writing an article or posting a video, your keyword should be listed in your title. That’s obvious.

But what most people forget is their meta description. A meta description is a short blurb that informs your reader of what the article is about. When you don’t enter your own meta, Google will pull that meta from the beginning of your article.

If your keywords aren’t in there, you will be shit out of luck. When possible, I recommend using a plug in that allows you to enter your own meta description. However, if it’s not possible, you need to make sure that the keyword appears in the meta at least once by putting it into your article within the first paragraph.

Also, why does no one use header tags anymore? Headers tags are kind of like lube. You don’t really need it, but when you use it, everything works much better.  A header tag shows Google that you consider something to be more important, and it gets more attention from Google. Remember, much like lube, header tags should be used sparingly.

Finally, keywords in the URL are incredibly important. If you are using a site like WordPress, never allow it to default to a gibberish URL. Write your own and make sure the keywords are in it. Keywords in the URL are like good oral sex. They aren’t everything everything, but they set the right mood.

Positioning your keywords is just as important as picking the right ones. Much like the Kama Sutra, with a few minor adjustments in position, you could go from a deflating disappointment, to an exploding page rank in no time.

Keywords and Finding Quality Bestiality Sex Tours

SEO is short for search engine optimization. One of the biggest things SEO depends on is keywords. Keywords tell the search engines what your article is about. For example, say your running a ‘Bestiality Sex Tours’ site

Your goal with your website should to to be the number 1 site that pops up when someone Google’s ‘vacations where I can have sex with animals’.

Back in the bad old days, spammers could get people to their pages through simply throwing the words 'vacations where I can have sex with animals’ into their content a hundred times, even if it made no sense to do so. They would make it the same color as their background and paste it in as invisible text.

Then, all the poor bastards out there looking to tour the world while doing it with animals got sent to poor quality sites. Their vacations were nothing more than a set of keys to a barn, not a beautiful weekend in Catalina romancing an alpaca.

So Google got smart and they released their Panda on those spammers asses. They also released a Penguin later, but that guy’s job was less important. Mainly, the Panda beat down the spammers and the Penguin came along to poop on them afterwards.

Panda is Google’s algorithm. Penguin is like Panda's wing man. It does the same thing, but on a smaller scale. Tricks like keyword stuffing and hidden text no longer work. Instead, quality works. Panda is based on how the human mind thinks because it was developed using actual people

A test group was given thousands of sites to go through, based on a certain keyword. The people on the study were asked questions like ‘did this site answer your questions? Is it really relevant? Do other sites use this one as a reference?’and told to score the site using a number.

Then, they used the way people thought to break it down to an algorithm.

When working with keywords, quality matters far more than quantity. In fact, you might get kicked in the ass for using too many keywords. When using keywords, pick a subject about your keyword. Then, let the writing flow naturally.

Afterwards, spell check, grammar check and spell check again. Then, take your text to a keyword density calculator. A keyword density calculator will tell you if you’ve used the keyword enough naturally or if you need to cram it a bit.

Take a look at the below example.

In this instance, my keywords were “animal sex” and “bestiality sex tour”. While many people disagree on density percentage, I have found 3-5% is the sweet spot.

You can do the math without using a calculator. The formula is;

 # keyword occurrences/total words.

I like to use a calculator to be exact.

Keyword Density Calculator

If you don’t have enough keywords, don’t stuff them in anywhere. Instead, edit and make sure they flow naturally. Sometimes, all you need to do is delete a sentence to get it just right.

Keywords are a bit easier than you think, as long as you’re a good writer. However, in the future, I’ll be bringing these up again and again, along with the word ‘quality’. You’ll probably want to punch me in the throat to get me to stop.

And I’ll probably enjoy it.